One direct result of reconnecting with God is that we find ourselves no longer feeling comfortable in the company of people that we previously considered friends. This is largely due to self-love and the awareness that the company we keep affects us.
This could mean just keeping a healthy distance from a few friends. Or letting go completely of some of them. But, at times, we aren’t able to keep any friends at all.
I remember when I reached this point a few months after my conversion. There were people I was friends with because we connected negatively – and letting them go was also a way of letting that side of me go.
Letting go of friends was difficult and made me feel isolated. But those ‘break ups’ were essential to make me see who I was, who I didn’t want to be and who I could be. A threefold process that could never take place without God’s guidance.
This process has also taught me how to identify people who I shouldn’t let into my life. A few months ago, I met a young woman who seemed very balanced at first, but who turned out to be conflictive, judgmental, resentful and needy.
I used to be just like her. It was painful to be around her. So I let her go.
Shortly after I met her, I became friends with another young woman who is very spiritual, mindful and peaceful. She is less assertive than I am and we don’t share the same beliefs, but there is definitely a ‘soul synchronicity’. Our friendship does us good and we don’t feed any type of conflict.
If you’re reading this and feeling really uncomfortable about your friendships, trust me: wherever conflict is the fuel, there is no growth or peace of mind.
The old saying is true: it’s best to be alone than in bad company. So let go of bad connections and embrace opportunities to build good ones!