healing love

How you can put grief into perspective with love

Death ceases to have a pervasive grasp on us when we know exactly where we came from and the beautiful home we’re heading to. We just have to let love lead us there.

As contradictory as it seems, fear of death is the very cause of a lot of the self-destruction that many people inflict on themselves – and it rubs off on others around them too. Without the certainty of eternal life, this life becomes all about self-indulgence and, needless to say, that always leads to emptiness.

I have personally experienced the hurtful side effects of someone choosing the path of self-destruction while grieving. I tried to support this person that I was close to, only to realize – a little too late – that there was really no amount of support that could possibly help someone without a spiritual life. Someone who decided to treat himself and others as if their lives were meaningless.

I was traumatized by this experience, and I know there are a lot of relationships out there being shattered because of grief. It is traumatic to be around someone who chooses to bury themselves with the dead instead of choosing to live and love the ones who are alive. And who love them.

The separation from a loved one is painful, but we must remind ourselves that it is only temporary. And if we live our lives under God’s grace, we will not fall into the destructive darkness of grief. His love will strengthen us with the ability to hope, heal and love ourselves and others.

While we might miss the absence of a loved one, the gracious response to it should be an overwhelming joy for the fact that our loved one is with God.

This joy proves that we have a genuine relationship with God. On the other hand, its absence proves that we haven’t really accepted God as the master of our lives and still live deeply attached to the deadly systems of this world.

Everyday we are called to live our lives in spirit and truth by the one who conquered death and saved us from it. All we have to do is follow him.


The Lord gives and the Lord takes away

I highly recommend reading the Book of Job. Our ‘downfalls’ are the only way for us to grow – and expecting to ‘get back’ what we had or find a new life that’s similiar to what we had… none of that is what Jesus is offering us.

Just look at Paul’s life, and Job’s – and how they reacted to their massive, mind blowing downfalls. Job worships God even when everything and everyone is ‘taken’ from him:  Job 1:21 “The Lord gives and the Lord takes away”

The suffering we experience is GOOD for us because in our weakness we reveal our true selves – mostly to ourselves and others. God already knows.

A lot of us still expect life to be ‘fixable’ in ways that are merely mundane. But our bodies mean very little, almost nothing, compared to our souls. God’s not working on our bodies or the lives we have here. Being afraid of death turns us into evil doers. Being afraid of losing the life we have also turns us into evil doers trying to keep it at all cost.

Nothing brings us closer to God than losing this life in order to be born into eternal life. For a lot of people this means material loss, health struggles and a neverending emotional struggle in interpersonal relationships.

I have seen people lose not this life, but their soul, in the process of wanting to fix a ‘broken’ loved one. Fear of loss and death comes from an attachment to this life. We REALLY can’t serve two Gods. If we can only serve a God that gives us the life we want here, then that’s not God at all – that’s just ourselves we’re serving. And God’s Grace is a complete mystery, so we only have one choice: surrender to it and trust God.

We’re all struggling. What changes everything for us struggling is how we react to it. That’s why Job and Paul are perfect examples, because the struggles of our current worlds are tiny compared to what they endured. I am by no means disregarding the pain we’re all experiencing – just focusing on the only answer to it: loving God. Not getting angry at him, who’s saving us from ourselves and for a much better life than the best one we could imagine here in this world.

NOTE: This is a comment that I posted on BeautyBeyondBones, the only blog I follow. I thought I’d share since it’s a post on its own. I also recommend the blog.

faith love

“Where Death Died”|Bono

I’m always touched when I hear Bono talk about his faith. The feeling of connection that faith brings is essential to inspire love in everyday life.