Love covers all our flaws

Have you spent the last couple of years making concessions so you would fit in? A lot of us have. And while these circumstances were a trigger of fit-in behavior, we should take this opportunity to better understand why we gave in.

For what reasons, and for how long are we willing to dissolve ourselves and lose our own identities in order to be a ‘part’ of a world that does not love us? A world that will drop us if we fail?

The answer is: not too long until we become deeply frustrated, angry and bitter. And what will really haunt us is not our difficulty to forgive others, but to forgive ourselves as we live with the consequences of our own decisions knowing that we could have made better ones had we not given in to the fear of not fitting in.

We should all know by now that whenever we try to live by strict rules, we are bound to fail at some point. We are human, and thus we are inherently flawed. We are living the life that others expect us to live when we make an effort everyday to be the perfect people that we are not.

When we accept that we are not in control, and that we never were or ever will be, that frees us from living under unfair expectations and introduces us to the real life we never had before.

This real life is the one we are all called to live. And it is only when we surrender to Love that we start living it.

Because Love covers all our flaws.

And when we put Love first in life, and allow it to guide us, we do not experience regrets. With Love, life no longer feels like a countdown, because we know Love transcends space and time.

Love allows us to transcend the world and start living without fear, especially the fear of death that drives many of us to make hasty decisions thinking we are running out of time.

But so what if we are running out of time? Love makes a day feel like a year, and a year feel like a day. It gives us a conscience that is no longer bound by feelings of who we are not, or not being good enough, and takes us on a journey of who we were always meant to be.

With Love, we live what we can, how we can, when we can.

I had no trouble being myself in the last couple of years and lived a relatively normal life. And the secret is simple: I know how to be subtle about my different outlook in life. Instead of using these differences to confront others, I focus on similarities that can unite us.

Remember: we need to be patient with those who think differently.

We are not called to turn our differences into instruments of divisiveness. When we keep Love in the foreground of how we treat each other, these differences become secondary and often don’t even come up.

At the same time, we are also not called to be perfect, but to be loving. And to love each other regardless of our different choices in life, and our shortcomings.

When we live this way, we do not feel the need to fit in. Putting Love first in our lives gives us this confidence and allows us to enjoy the peace, joy and hope that come when we confidently know why we don’t fit in this world.

The joy of forgiveness

How we talk about people who hurt us says a lot about whether or not we have a relationship with the One who made us.

I met a Christian man recently who has been divorced for four years and talks in a resentful and bitter way about his ex-wife. According with him, she had no right before God to divorce him.

It was hard to listen to him. His voice, no matter what I talked about, was full of judgment and condemnation.

What he is missing in his life is not his ex-wife, but the joy of forgiveness. This is a gift that we receive from God when we allow him to make his home in us.

He attends church every Sunday and tried to discredit my faith when I said I wasn’t religious.

Yet no regular attendance to a place or membership to a group will give any of us the divine ability to forgive everyone. It comes from God when we are humble and willing to receive it.

It is only when we forgive everyone, and genuinely love and wish them well, that we experience divine joy.

Once we have tasted it, we always come back for more.

When this joy overflows in our spirit, our voices become an encouragement for others who can’t forgive and, as a result, can’t find peace in their lives.

If you are struggling with bitterness and resentment, pray for the willingness to be filled with love and forgiveness.

And you will joyfully taste peace that exceeds all understanding.

We heal when we forgive everyone

Forgiveness sets us free, but selective forgiveness has the opposite effect. We only heal when we forgive everyone.

No exceptions.

Serial killers, dictators, rapists? People who have cheated, abused and committed crimes against us? Yes, we are called to forgive them too. Our calling is to forgive the whole world.

If we forgive only the people who we think deserve to be forgiven, we are doing nothing more than judging them based on merit and singling them out.

When we take this path, we inevitably feed resentment. That’s how we end up chained to the people we can’t forgive. 

We have to forgive everyone. Instantly.

Forgiveness is an attitude towards life. Even people who have no relationship with God know that. What they don’t know is that it is only by God’s grace that we can forgive with a loving heart.

When we seek him first, we experience the power of forgiveness as a blessing. And it releases us from our chains straight into his loving arms, where we enjoy his peace and joy.

We know we are forgiven when we repent

Genuine repentance, sincere and fruitful, produces change of mind, attitude and posture. But we are only capable of repentance when God forgives us. 

God’s forgiveness is what produces repentance. 

The blessing of repentance comes from God. He crushes us, provoking our heart. He knows us, he wants us, and he forgave us through Jesus across time and space. 

Yet we are creatures of spacetime and, every time we sin, we need his eternal forgiveness to provoke our repentance. 

Without divine forgiveness, there is no repentance.

Repentance is always preceded by divine forgiveness. We have to be crushed by God’s sovereign forgiveness that turns us inside out to surrender. As we surrender, we are transformed. 

Our spirit recognizes a sovereignty that comes before any human conclusion. So even those who don’t genuinely believe in God experience repentance. Repentance is God’s power at play.

When we repent, we know that God has forgiven us.

Rebuilding our love bonds with a spirit of repentance

Every relationship that we have will experience cracks in its structure at some point. But we can mend those cracks, or even rebuild a broken bond, with a spirit of repentance.

Love teaches us to repent and live life with a renewed spirit that makes possible what wasn’t possible before. We are given a chance to do what is right and move on with a hopeful spirit.

While the world puts a lot of weight on “telling the truth”, repentance is about actions, not words.

We are called to rebuild our love bonds with repentance through a change in our attitude. It is our actions that express love.

This means that if a hurtful truth from which we wholeheartedly repent is bound to break our love bond, Jesus isn’t calling us to tell it and crush someone with its unbearable weight.

We’re not called to tell a truth that crushes. Destructive truths can only destroy. Instead, we are called to live the truth of our repentance and rebuild our love bonds with love.

When being wronged is good

We will be wronged a lot in the course of our lives.

Each of us has the freedom to either be wronged and not take action against our oppressor or pursue the justice of this world.

Yet it is when we have the willingness to be wronged and to suffer loss that we are given the opportunity to keep Christ’s virtue at a cost that this world is not willing to pay.

The very fact that you have lawsuits among you means you have been completely defeated already. Why not rather be wronged? Why not rather be cheated?

Paul

I know wonderful people who have suffered severe wrongdoings.

Thanks to their surrender and faith in the wise ways of God, they make a decision everyday not to pursue worldly justice. Their peace and joy overflow and inspire.

This way of life, which mirrors Jesus’ spirituality, resonates with few of us. Yet this is the life that rewards us with peace that exceeds all understanding. This is the divine life worth living.

This world can judge us, but Love changes who we are

While we insist on judging ourselves, or listening when others judge us, we miss the fact that repentance is the power of God’s forgiveness already operating in us.

As for me, it matters very little how I might be evaluated by you or by any human authority. I don’t even trust my own judgment on this point.

Paul

We repent and rely exclusively on the One who makes us better. Relying on ourselves or the public opinion will crush us.

When God himself came here as the fully man, fully God Jesus, it was to draw us to him as a means to become like him.

We’re forgiven. We build our house upon this Rock.

By following his way and truth, we enjoy a peaceful life that doesn’t have an expiration date. The life he gives us in the spirit.

The judgment of this world has no power over our spirit. It is God who justifies and turns for good what was once used for evil.

Always be the good company that others are grateful for

Being good company is about loving our company – something that the coaches, books or articles of this world cannot teach.

Like me, you’ve probably experienced your share of company that is unhelpful in the course of your life. What we can do is forgive those who hurt us and be more selective about the people who we allow to come closer to us moving forward.

When we let go of what doesn’t do us good, we make space for what brings good to our lives.

We should never, ever be too busy when others that we know need us. And when we make ourselves available, there is yet another stepping stone: being good company.

This world might have forgotten what being good company is like, but we should not.

We laugh with those who laugh, and cry with those who cry.

We don’t ridicule others.

We don’t look down on or judge others we don’t like, but pray for them.

We encourage each other with hopeful, peaceful and loving words.

We don’t oppress one another with the expectations of this world, but listen to what we need and what is good for our spirit.

We remind each other that everything is possible for the One who made us when something seems impossible.

We rejoice in the fact that all things contribute to our good, and that the struggles of this world can’t crush us.

We happily offer practical help and not simply wait until there is an urgency or emergency to step up.

We make sure our “yes” is a “yes” and our “no” is a “no”, because we won’t be good company to someone when we say the opposite of what’s in our hearts.

Setting boundaries is important, so we know what and how much we can give. This way, we won’t raise false expectations in others that we know we can’t meet.

Good company makes us grateful because they are available, helpful and a joy to be around thanks to their noticeable appreciation for us.

Our love for one another should be felt in our words, but most importantly in our actions. These actions could be as simple as a heartfelt hug, or taking a real interest in how someone is doing instead of just asking and letting it be.

I’d like to encourage all of us to put in more love in our interactions with others. Let’s take the time to let them know what we appreciate about them whenever there is an opportunity and not just leave it on that note.

Let’s remain a constant presence in their lives in loving ways and show we are grateful for each other’s lives.

If it glows, then it is Love

We all have tasted loneliness at some point in our lives. 

It isn’t simply about not having company, but about having quality company that does us good. And that is not easy to find.

But the good news is, we are far from being alone. And this loneliness that clouds our judgment and keeps us from seeing with the eyes of faith can be defeated.

So how do we defeat it? Well, the answer is: we don’t. It is the One who made us with unconditional love who defeats it. But he can only defeat our loneliness when we humbly accept his love. 

Our lives are transformed when we become conscious of this love and gain the confidence, through faith, that we are not alone.

When we follow his ways, there’s no reason to feel lonely, because he gives us every opportunity to be with others who reflect his love. 

Yet if we still feel lonely at times, we just have to call his name and he will be there through the people he brings into our lives.

How to be aware without judging

Thanks to sharing God’s divinity, we are able to love everyone. This love is His power operating in us. At the same time, He gives us discernment, so that we can make better decisions in life in accordance with his teachings through Jesus.

It is important to be aware that someone’s behavior doesn’t reflect the teachings of Jesus, who is God incarnated and thus teaches us how to become the best human beings we can be.

But if I turn to attack this person, using Jesus as a weapon, and feeding my attack from a place of condemnation and sense of superiority, I have lost the battle against the evil in me.

Acting this way is no better than any other person in this world who doesn’t know Jesus. In fact, when I claim to know Jesus, my attack is far worse than if it would have come out of ignorance.

When we are of the same mind as Jesus, we are aware of what is not good without judging others. Even He, being God, didn’t come here to judge us, so why should we judge one another?

He teaches us to pray for others who we believe to be misguided.

We might not like their behavior, and God is not asking us to keep or seek company that doesn’t do us good. But we can love them and pray for them to be transformed.